When I miss you...

Can't stop thinking about you, missing you....

As I sit alone,
I remember the beautiful moments we spent together...
I'm waiting till we can meet again - my Zharfan & my hubby :)

I always say 'I love you' to my boy whenever I called him, and I love hearing him repeating the same things to me ;)

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
4.45 pm

Love...

"A successful marriage requires fallings in love many times, always with the same person."(Melaine Powell)

I gave an email to my hubby, expressing my intention to do something together [something to spark up our marriage :) ]once I'm back in Msia...initially I was not sure whether he would accept my suggestion or not...but when I asked him via sms, he replied that he is ok with my idea...so that keeps me smiling for the whole day... :)

I really look forward to going back to Msia...if only I could speed up the pace of time, I would have done that :)

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
5.20 pm

8th meeting with Prof T

I had the 8th meeting with Prof Torremans at 2 pm. Alhamdulillah, my first chapter is completed now, after he has revised the correction that I submitted last week. There will be a final meeting tentatively on 11th March, before I go back to Msia.

In the morning, I called my Zharfan...it hurts me a lot, knowing that he has been waiting for me on the front door...his Nenek told me today, that my baby put on his shoes on his own, and then carried his Barney backpack around on his bike, as if he is going to school, and then he keeps on waiting at the door...that made me cry again...the feeling is getting unbearable now- I'm suffering miserably here too...we got to be strong my boy, there's just another 24 days to go...Mama will fetch you and I will never leave you again :(

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
4.25 pm

Another boring Monday

In the morning, I went to the library to return some books...On the way back, I bumped into Kak Tim and her hubby, Abg Zainal. They invited me for a dinner at their house this coming Saturday. They have been very nice to me - one of the many kind-hearted people that I know while in Notts...

25 more days to go...sometimes I feel that time does stand still *sigh* - so lonely, no mood to focus on my study :(

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
6.50 pm

Spicing up our life

It's always nice to spice up our mundane life, our routine...
My routine since the last five months plus is to study, read, write, eat, solat, shopping - and the spices of course when I spent sweet moment exchanging "lovey-dovey" sms with my hubby...on top of chatting with my Zharfan over the phone...

It's always a blessing in disguise for us (me, hubby and baby) to go through this temporal, distance relationship - our love grows stronger day by day... Alhamdulillah for Your Blessings...

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
5.30 pm

Lonely weekend...

Minus this weekend, I have 3 more lonely weekends to spend here...I gonna miss my life here at Notts, but I can't live happily without my baby and hubby with me...

"I don't want you to know, so I try to be strong. I don't want you to think that without you, I can't go on. But that's how it is, and that's how it will be, because, my baby and my hubby, I love you, I need you, I miss you, and without you, there's just no me."

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
5.25 pm

Packing up - 2nd round

Palshipping sent me the boxes (2 medium size boxes) this morning...so for the second time with full excitement I spent my whole morning packing up the stuff into the boxes...and finally its done :)

I called my hubby as usual - it's always comforting to talk to him, to hear his voice....distance and this temporary separation has made us appreciating each other to the fullest...I miss him...and I know he misses me...

In the afternoon, I walked to Mothercare (since there's a promo sale of 10% discount on the purchase). Other than my own items, I bought a toy for my sweetheart, my Zharfan....I miss my baby every single moment....

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
5.30 pm

One month to go!!

Yes...30 more days = 4 more weeks for me to go back to Msia...

In the morning, I had a short meeting with Prof Sue Arrowsmith -she's my postgraduate student advisor.
I also bought the National Express (coach) ticket online from Notts to Heathrow Airport for the departure date 21/3/08 - that costs me GBP 36.50...
All in all, everything is almost done, except for the sending 2 more boxes via Palshipping- hopefully it can be settled next week...

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
5.45 pm

Correction submitted

Yes, finally I completed my revised draft chapter one and submitted it via email to my supervisor...
Right now, just focusing on reading for continuous literature survey....and dreaming of going home ;)

"Before I sleep and after I wake up and all the hours in between ... you occupy my mind. So, practically every moment of the day you are in my thoughts. I miss you - my baby and my hubby..."

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
5.30 pm

A baby is a blessing

A baby is always a miracle, a manifestation of love...I have been thinking since couple of weeks, and I've made my mind...I share my thought with my hubby and he seems happy with my decision...yes...I hope and pray to be blessed with another baby.

Until recently, I thought I would defer this plan until I have completed my phD in September 2010, but 2008 has made me to rethink and reconsider... I know my hubby is always happy for us to have another baby, since our Zharfan will be 3 years old this coming May.

Insya Allah, if Allah wants it to happen, it will happen eventually...Amiin...

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
7.00 pm

Sharing the excitement

When I called my baby this morning, he was in a jovial mood- I keep on telling him that I'm coming home soon to fetch him, and I ask him to pick me up at the airport. We really share the excitement of seeing each other again...I miss him, and I know I have missed quite a lot of his milestone. I remember the other day my hubby was telling me that our Zharfan now can say and respond "tak tahu" in a right situation. And today my mom was telling me that my boy can say "tak cayalah nenek" when he talked to his Nenek...

32 more days to go...

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
5.50 pm

A trip to remember...

Birmingham is such a big city, much bigger compared to Notts, and the weather is extremely cold too!!!... Yesterday, I went to Sealife (like Aquaria or Underwater World in Msia). Then I stayed overnite in Traveldoge-sharing a room with Aisyah, Farizah & her baby Fawaz.

Today, I went to Cadbury World. Then I went to one of the shopping complexes in Birm, called Bullring. Overall it's such a nice, fun, enjoyable, new experience (+tiring too, especially on the way back). Travelling in Europe, the biggest challenge I think is to find a place to perform solat and to find halal food. Yet to take photos (lots of them!!) is one of the best things to do, because of the wonderful, lovely scenery of Europe :)

I would have enjoyed my trip more if my hubby and baby is around with me here...To comfort myself, I did sms my hubby + gave him a call few times during the trip - I guess he knows how much I miss him and wanna be with him....Insya Allah, soon...

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
6.45 pm

Off to Birmingham

I gave my Zharfan and my hubby a call before I left for Birm.

Minus this weekend, there are 4 more weekends for me to spend here at Notts...the time is getting closer and closer...

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
7.20 am

Just another cold, wintry day....

The weather has been cold since the last few days... 4 degree celcius today...

Not really in mood to write (nor to study), just doing some reading and net-surfing..*sigh*

Anyway, I did chat with my hubby via ym for few minutes - he's tired as usual after a long day at work..I just inform him that I would be leaving for Birmingham trip tomorrow morning (together with my friends here in Notts - we are going for sight-seeing and spending overnite there:)

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
5.30 pm

A busy morning ;)

Finally, I got an email from TH Travel confirming the flight booking as I requested (only after I called them again this morning!)

So for the whole morning, I was busily making reservation/booking for flight tickets for myself (KL-KB), for my parents, my Zharfan & I (KB-KL) and for my parents to return to KB. It's done!! Alhamdulillah.

In the eve, after discussing with my hubby, I managed to reserve a room in Concorde Hotel Shah Alam, so that I would spend overnite (one night transit) with my hubby of course, before flying back to KB to see my baby...

So now, counting the days again as usual, its 5 MORE WEEKS to go!!!!
Ilal liqa'

Mama Zharfan

6.30 pm

Research Presentation Day

Yes, it's over. My presentation went smoothly as planned, Alhamdulillah....

I joined the lunch which was meant for all the phD students- there quite a number of us apparently, more than 50 I guess.

Before I go back to my room, I walked to Beeston...I bought a 9ct gold charm bracelet for myself from Argos!! It is so sweet, very light ones, as it only costs me 19.99 pound...I simply love gold jewelleries, and I believe that all women do...

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
5.20 pm

I miss them...

yes...i miss my baby and my hubby...

"dear..do u know how much i miss u... try to catch the rain drops...those that u catch is how much u miss me..but those that u left is how much i miss u...."

in the morning, i called TH travel & tours in Kl to inquire about my air ticket. To my surprise, they have yet to receive the instruction from UIA. when I called UIA, it is apparent that the letter of instruction is still on the way, as it was posted via ordinary mail - the delay is attributed to the CNY long holidays. *sigh*
I need to get the confirmation soonest possible before I could proceed to buy another MAS ticket for me to fly to my hometown, and then from KB -KL with my Zharfan and my parents, and then my parents to go back to KB... lots of things to be done, so I really need the confirmation from TH travel!!!

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
4.55 pm

Panel Review Interview

Alhamdulillah, the interview went smoothly :)

Before I attended the interview (at 11am), I gave a call to my Zharfan, just to ensure that he's ok after my hubby left him with his nenek. My mom said my boy did not cry, but his tears rolled down his cheek when my mother told him not to cry :( pity my baby...He understands that his papa got to go to work and leave him with nenek, and he is waiting for me to come back and fetch him...that's what I tell him everytime I speak to him on the phone.

I also called my hubby...it's a relief to know that he has arrived in KL safely. My hubby seemed to be happy to receive a card that I sent him ( actually the card was meant for our 4th first date anniversary-this coming 17 Feb!)...Love is in the air :)

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
5.30 pm

Friends...

It's a great blessings to have friends whom you can laugh with and depend on whenever you need it...being faraway from Msia, I always count my blessings to get to know some true friends here in Notts, like qawy, farizah & fatz, aishah & latif...I hope that the friendship that I've made here will last even when I'm back in Msia, or when they're back in Msia in 3 years time... :)

When I was surfing the net few days back, I saw some love quotes on one of the forum on cari.com.my... Other than 'baby quotes'. I do love these kinds of lovely, romantic quotes..:) so sweet to dedicate it to my loved one (who else, my hubby of course! ;)

"Though miles may lie between us, we're never far apart, for our love doesn't count the miles, it's measured by the heart."

40 days to go...it's getting closer and closer...

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
4.50 pm

Engagement

Today is my brother's engagement day (Nizar-Aimi). My whole family went to Trg for that occassion, all, except me and my sister jema. I pray for my brother and future sister-in-law that they will be the loving couple (like me!! :) and that their wedding in August will be smooth as planned. Amiin.

As for my self, not really in mood to go out (monthly red light)...so I just spent the whole day staying in the room, doing some reading for the purpose of completing the correction of first chapter..

41 more days to go...no words can describe my misery, loneliness, the unbearable feeling to be with my baby and hubby... :(

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
4.45 pm

Love is like the wind...

"Love is like the wind, you can't see it, but you can feel it..."

This lovely quote is taken from my favourite movie, A Walk To Remember...the quote is so sweet, true and touching...

Because of the distance, I can't see my baby and my baby right now; I can't be with them...but I can feel the love, our mutual love, my love to them, their love for me...

I miss them miserably lately... :(

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
4.40 pm

Webcam

There's nothing that could make me happier than seeing my Zharfan on webcame-live via yahoo messenger :) he was excited to see me, as the last time we saw each other via webcam was during the hari raya puasa last year....

6 more weeks to go....I keep on whispering to myself...the time is closer, and the much awaited moment will come soon, Insya Allah...

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
5 pm

Sunny, happy day...

The weather is good - not so cold today :)

In the morning, I gave a call to IIUM Educare and managed to speak to Puan Raihan, the vice principal, appealing to her to re-enrol my Zharfan. She asked me to follow-up again in early March...there's a hope I think...

In the afternoon, I went to school. First, I went to library to collect my inter-library loans, then collected ILL vouchers from Danielle. When I checked my pigeon hole, I found out that my cheque for travel claim is already there... :)
The discussion with Prof Torremans about my presentation next Wednesday also went smoothly. Alhamdulillah.

My hubby gave me a sms, saying that our Zharfan is so 'manja' and lonely without friend... emm...what does that mean...If we were to have another baby, I'm afraid that I could not cope with my study and research project, the worst part is the fact that I have to come again to UK in 2010, if I have another baby...well...can't decide now... (but deep in my heart, I hope and pray that we would be blessed with another baby...)

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
6.30 pm

Hubby & baby are together again..

Alhamdulillah, so glad and relieve to know that my hubby has arrived home (our kampung in Kelantan) safely this afternoon. Hubby was telling me that our boy was a bit 'malu-malu' seeing him...it took about few moments before our Zharfan happily playing with my hubby, giggling, cuddling :) ...
I can imagine that my Zharfan will be VERY 'malu-malu' when he first sees me on the coming 23rd March- because by that time he has not seen me for almost 7 months!!!...another 45 days to go...

In the eve, I was not feeling well...feeling tired, not in mood...not sure what's the reason. So I canceled my intention to go the library to collect the inter-library-loan book that I have requested.
And I received an email from my supervisor asking me to see him tomorrow at 2.30 pm to discuss about my draft slides for presentation that I have emailed him on Monday...*sigh*

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
6.30 pm

A new tri-cycle

When I called my Zharfan this morning (late afternoon in Msia), my mother told me that my baby was happily riding his new tri-cycle which was bought by my father for his beloved grandson (Zharfan is the youngest in my family!)
My little sweetheart also giggled and laughed merrily when I told him that his papa will go back to see him tomorrow :)

As far as my study is concerned, I spent the whole day reading and browsing through certain chapters of a book written by Cornish. In the eve, I received an email from Danielle of Law School, giving me the schedule for Feb panel interview. My slot will be on Monday 11th Feb at 11 am. The same week I'd be presenting for the Research Presentation Day on 13th Feb. It's gonna be a hectic week then...*sigh*

Despite this intense and packed schedule of work to be completed, I miss my baby and hubby miserably, and the feeling is sometimes unbearable... :(

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
5.45 pm

Baby's toy

Other than clothes and books, I love buying toys, especially educational toys for my little boy...UK boasts great selection of branded toys such as Fisher Price, Tomy, VTech, ELC, Leapfrog and so forth. I believe that toys is one of the best, creative, fun medium for my Zharfan to learn new skills while enjoying himself.

Today, I bought him another toy, just to add to his toys collection...
and indeed, I have always been missing my sweetheart since the day we were apart...

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
7.45 pm

Saturday = shopping day

When I woke up this morning at 6 am, I saw out of my window there was snow on grass, on the road, on cars, on roofs...The white scenery is so nice...as I've never seen it before in Malaysia :)

But I'm a little bit tired for not getting enough sleep last nite...I only fell asleep at 2.30 am due to the noise from my flatmates birthday party- it's so annoying :(

Not wanting to feel tired and bored staying in my room, I joined Farizah for groceries shopping - we went to Hyperama, Asda, Asiana, Manlii and Medina. I spent quite a lot today, with the hope that the food stock will last for few weeks (if possible until the very last day I'm here! :)

Before going out, I chatted with my hubby on the phone - our topic of conversation of course revolves around our sweetheart, Zharfan...my hubby is looking forward to see our Zharfan when he goes back to Kelantan next week on Tuesday...He misses him, so am I...
and the countdown goes on ( 6 weeks 5 days more!!!)

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
6.30 pm

Snow!!!

Yes, it is a snowy day today!! It was snowing lightly (but enough to cheer me up) when I was walking to catch a bus on the way to the library. This is in fact the second time I saw snow since I have been here in September. It rarely snows in Notts - I was so excited and delighted to feel it, to see it with my own eyes.

I wish I could share this awesome experience with my hubby and baby. ( I immediately sent sms to my hubby the tell him my 'snow' experience!)

Insya Allah, when my Zharfan comes with me to Notts in 2010, he will be having the same fascinating experience :)

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
4.25 pm

Bad & good news

My hubby was on MC today, as he was not well since last nite...pity my hubby, because I'm not around to take care of him in these difficult times... :(

The good news is that my hubby got one month bonus from his employer (though not much, but little is always better than nothing...) Alhamdulillah...

I have made a schedule for my self to ensure that I would be able to complete all the tasks within the remaining 7 weeks...*sigh*

So right now my hubby, myself and our Zharfan must endure and persevere the suffering for another 49 days before we are going to be together again...

Ilal liqa'
Mama Zharfan
6.50 pm